NAVIGATING NEGATIVE THOUGHTS

Have you ever felt trapped in a cycle of negative thoughts, wondering why they seem so hard to shake? Are you ever thinking about the same issues over and over and over again, in the shower or in bed or at work? The answer lies in understanding how your mind operates through two main systems: the primitive brain and the evolved brain. These systems interact in fascinating ways, and learning to navigate between them is key to overcoming patterns of fear, self-doubt, and frustration.

EVOLUTION OF OUR HUMAN BRAIN

The human brain is a marvel, built for survival and creativity. It’s a product of millions of years of evolution, beginning with early primates about 50–60 million years ago. Over time, hominins appeared, walking upright and gradually developing larger brains. Around 300,000 years ago, Homo sapiens emerged with a prefrontal cortex capable of advanced thinking, language, and creativity. This was the foundation of art, problem-solving, and planning—the abilities that define us today.

Yet, this evolved brain is only part of the story and only accounts for about 5% of our brain's history. Beneath it lies the primitive brain, which has existed far longer, focused solely on survival. While this part of the brain served our ancestors well in dangerous environments, its urgency can overwhelm us in today’s world, where immediate threats are rare.

THE PRIMITIVE BRAIN

The primitive brain, sometimes called the “reptilian brain,” is reactive, always scanning for danger or reward. It’s what kept our ancestors safe, helping them avoid danger and make split-second decisions, and has been around for millions of years. It evolved to protect us, triggering fight-or-flight responses to help early humans avoid predators or survive harsh conditions. This part of the brain doesn’t stop to think—it acts fast, which was essential for survival.

In today’s world, however, the primitive brain often overreacts. It can’t tell the difference between real threats and modern stressors like public speaking, work pressures, or disagreements. The amygdala, a key part of this system, floods your body with stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline in response to perceived danger, even when no real threat exists.

Every day, your mind generates between 6,000 and 60,000 thoughts—many and primarily shaped by the primitive brain’s focus on safety. This constant vigilance can leave you feeling anxious, on edge, and overwhelmed. Over time, it may lead to stress, difficulty focusing, and emotional burnout. But by understanding how the primitive brain works, you can start to manage its influence and reduce its hold on your life.

Focus

• Short-Term Survival: Ensures immediate safety and basic needs are met.

• Avoid Danger, Seek Pleasure: Reacts instinctively to avoid pain and pursue immediate gratification or rewards.

• Fear and Impulses: Dominated by fear-based reactions, it prioritizes quick, defensive responses over thoughtful reflection.

Emotional Regulation: Reactive and Instinctual

• Fight-or-Flight: Emotional regulation here is dominated by instinctual reactions such as fear, anger, or pleasure.

• Fear and Aggression: The primitive brain is quick to trigger fear-based responses (e.g., anxiety, stress) and aggression when a threat is perceived, even if the danger is not real (e.g., a critical email or social rejection).

Decision-Making: Impulsive and Reactive

• Decisions are driven by instinct and immediate needs, often based on fear, urgency, or pleasure-seeking.

Primary Functions and Needs

Physiological needs

• Ensures immediate safety and basic needs for survival. 

• Operates on fear of deprivation, leading to hoarding behaviors or overeating.

Safety and security needs

• Needs shelter, sees threat everywhere and in everyone, always highly concerned. 

• Constantly scans the environment for potential dangers, whether physical (predators, accidents) or social (conflicts, financial loss).

• Strong territorial instincts, like defending personal property or resisting change

Love and belongings needs

• Seeks acceptance and has a strong fear of rejection. 

• Operates with tribal ("in-group vs. out-group") mindset, prioritizing loyalty to the group for security. 

Esteem Needs

• Seeks external recognition and status to improve access to resources and mates.

• It fears failure, humiliation, or loss of status, leading to competitive or defensive behaviors

• Seeks immediate rewards such as praise.

Self-Actualization Needs

• Survival-driven achievement of goals such as dominance.

• Often resists growth that involves risk, change, or stepping outside of comfort zones.

THE EVOLVED BRAIN

The evolved brain, located in the prefrontal cortex, is the seat of logic, empathy, and self-reflection. It enables higher-level functions like planning, decision-making, and emotional regulation. This is the part of your brain that distinguishes humans from most other species and that allows you to pause, reflect, and choose a thoughtful response instead of reacting impulsively.

Unlike the primitive brain, the evolved brain helps you analyze situations, imagine future possibilities, and learn from past experiences. Through neuroplasticity—the brain’s ability to rewire itself—you can strengthen the evolved brain over time. Practices like mindfulness, problem-solving, and emotional regulation exercises build neural pathways that make thoughtful responses more automatic.

Focus

• Long-Term Well-Being: Plans for future outcomes, emphasizing sustainability and personal growth.

• Rational Decision-Making: Balances logic, values, and long-term consequences to guide behavior.

• Empathy and Connection: Seeks deeper, meaningful relationships and collaborative solutions.

• Purpose and Growth: Focuses on achieving potential, aligning actions with values, and contributing to broader goals.

Emotional Regulation: Reflective and Deliberate

• Emotional Awareness: The evolved brain fosters awareness of emotions, helping you identify what you’re feeling and why.

• Impulse Control: It overrides the primitive brain’s immediate impulses, allowing for delayed gratification and considered actions.

Decision-Making: Deliberate and Thoughtful

• Weighs options, considers long-term impacts, and aligns decisions with values and goals.

Primary Functions and Needs

Physiological needs

• Regulates these needs through planning, moderation, and consideration of long-term consequences. 

• Chooses healthier food options and balances sleep schedules.

Safety and security needs

• Helps plan for future safety by creating strategies, laws, and systems.

• Evaluates threats more objectively, can resonate, and evaluate risks considering probability and long-term consequences 

• Emotional regulation helps manage fears and anxieties enabling rational decision-making

Love and belongings needs

• Needs meaningful relationships, cultivates connections based on compassion and shared goals. 

• Promotes empathy, diversity, inclusivity,  and collaboration beyond immediate social circles.

Esteem Needs

• Driven by intrinsic motivators, where self-worth is built on personal values, achievements, and growth.

• Focuses on long-term goals and the joy of mastering skills

• Processes setbacks constructively, viewing failures as opportunities for learning and self-improvement.

Self-Actualization Needs

• Explores one’s purpose, embracing creativity, and contributing to society in meaningful ways

• Has the ability to see beyond immediate needs, striving for long-term fulfillment.

• Drives a desire to align actions with core values and live a life of integrity and authenticity.

While the primitive brain reacts quickly, the evolved brain equips you to take control, break free from negative thought cycles, and foster growth. Balancing these two systems is key to resilience and intentional living.

DISSOCIATING FROM YOUR THOUGHTS

The inner voice we hear often feels so closely tied to our sense of identity that separating it from who we truly are can be challenging. It likely mirrors the tone of your actual voice, which reinforces the belief that it reflects your true self. This connection is further strengthened by the ego, as we instinctively call this voice “I,” embedding it deeply into our self-perception. This strong link makes it especially difficult to question the stories and narratives it creates—particularly when those narratives are negative.

Yet, just like your breathing or heartbeat functions as part of your biological system, so do your thoughts and emotions. These processes aren’t inherently “you”; they’re natural mechanisms designed to help you survive. Much like your heart rate or respiration, your thoughts and feelings arise in response to stimuli—sometimes shifting dramatically, sometimes maintaining a steady rhythm—all to help you adapt and thrive. For instance, when your heart rate fluctuates, you don’t blame yourself as if it’s a personal shortcoming. Instead, you view it as a signal—your heart is communicating that something needs your attention. You might decide to adjust your habits, manage stress, or seek medical advice to restore balance.

The same idea applies to your thoughts and emotions. They are signals, not measures of your worth or character. Negative or overwhelming thoughts don’t define you; they simply indicate that something in your mental or emotional environment requires attention. When you see your inner voice as a natural part of your biology, you can approach it with more compassion. It’s not about rejecting or silencing your mind but about listening to its messages, understanding them, and making changes to foster balance and harmony.

By adopting this perspective, your inner voice shifts from being a controlling force to becoming a useful tool. This change empowers you to guide your thoughts with intention, observe them without judgment, and redirect them toward growth and self-improvement. It’s a way to reclaim your power—to see yourself not as the sum of your thoughts, but as someone who chooses how to respond to them.

To bring this awareness to life, consider giving your primitive brain a name or persona—something playful yet relatable. Doing so creates a sense of separation between your authentic self and the mental chatter, giving you the ability to interact with your thoughts in a more deliberate and mindful way. Here’s how you can begin:

Step 1: Name Your Inner Voice

Give your primitive brain a name and a persona (be creative - I call mine Crazy Marco)

Step 2: Observe with Curiosity

Begin cultivating awareness of your thoughts by observing them with curiosity. Pay attention to what they reveal, listen attentively, and take note of recurring patterns.

Step 3: Build a Relationship

Foster a healthy relationship with it and start interacting with it using one of these techniques: 

• A Child: Picture your inner voice as a young child running freely through the house, curious and energetic but needing gentle discipline, guidance and structure. Give it direction with patience and kindness, just as you would gently steer a child away from harm or chaos.

• A Chimp: Imagine your mind as a wild chimp swinging from branch to branch, chaotic and full of energy. To guide it, create a safe and structured space. Redirect its energy with meaningful tasks or focused activities that keep it engaged and productive.

• A Complainer: Imagine your inner critic as a "Karen"—always yapping, exaggerating, and making unnecessary demands. Just as you might listen calmly to a complainer without taking their words to heart, challenge these exaggerated criticisms with patience and logic. Acknowledge its concerns, but set boundaries to keep it from running the show.

• A Coachee: View your inner voice as a mentee seeking growth. Coach it by listening, offering advice, and fostering constructive thought patterns for a proactive mindset.

You can create your own character to better suit your unique thought patterns or challenges. Tailor the metaphor to resonate with your personal experiences, making it a powerful tool for managing and understanding your inner dialogue.

When addressing this inner voice, make this to refer to it as “it” instead of “I.” For example, you might say, “Crazy Marco is out of control today; it keeps saying or doing X, Y, Z.”, which will reinforce dissociation.

BALANCING YOUR MIND

You now understand how your primitive brain often takes the lead in shaping your thoughts and reactions and recognize the potential of your evolved brain to step in and disrupt these negative patterns. Practice awareness, and notice when your inner dialogue kicks in and when negative thoughts arise or you feel overwhelmed - these moments are signals that your primitive brain is in charge. Take a pause, reflect, and ask yourself:

• Is this thought based on facts or assumptions?

• Do I really want to think that thought? 

• Is this thought driven by my primitive brain, or can I involve my evolved brain to respond better?

• What evidence do I have that supports this thought?

• How would I feel if I let go of this thought? 

• Who would I be without this thought?

• What’s a more empowering way to view this?

These questions help interrupt automatic reactions, giving your evolved brain time to step in and reframe the situation. It’s not about ignoring negative thoughts but observing them with curiosity rather than judgment. It’s a form of metacognition—thinking about your thoughts—that helps you understand their origin and intent.

Here are some additional actionable ways to balance your primitive and evolved brains:

• Mindfulness Meditation: Practice observing your thoughts without judgment. Focus on your breath, and gently bring your attention back when it wanders. This trains you to respond thoughtfully rather than react impulsively.

• Journaling: Spend a few minutes each day writing down your thoughts. Over time, you’ll spot patterns and triggers that activate your primitive brain, helping you address them more effectively.

• Physical Activity: Exercise reduces stress and engages the prefrontal cortex. Activities like running, yoga, or even a brisk walk release endorphins, improving mood and focus while promoting emotional regulation.

• Daily Pauses: Before reacting to stressful situations, pause. Count to five or take a few deep breaths. These small breaks give your evolved brain a chance to intervene and guide your response.

The goal isn’t to silence negative thoughts—they’re part of being human. Instead, it’s about managing their influence and giving your evolved brain the chance to lead. The primitive brain is five times stronger than the evolved brain, which means survival thoughts and impulses will always arise, no matter how much you practice. Repeatedly asking reflective questions helps build new neural pathways, gradually replacing negative loops with constructive habits.

Balancing these two systems is transformative. By understanding how your primitive and evolved brains interact, you can stop letting negative thoughts define you. The more you practice, the more you develop the ability to intentionally guide your mind, fostering clarity, purpose, and resilience in all aspects of your life. 

"Your mind is your instrument. Learn to be its master, not its slave."